Press Sec Neera Tanden Sends Putin Box Of Dildos

WASHINGTON – After a campaign as bruising as 2016’s was, perhaps it’s not surprising that even the victors are still reeling from some of the unprecedented foreign and domestic interference that beset Hillary Clinton’s winning campaign. This week, just-announced incoming White House Press Secretary Neera Tanden, a longtime Clinton friend who rose to prominence in the Wikileaks document drop for her blunt and often foul-mouthed assessments of prominent Democrats, including Clinton herself, revealed on Twitter that she’d shipped a Christmas present to Russian leader Vladimir Putin.

“And since you were such a naughty boy, you’re getting a big box of dildos!” Tanden posted to the site, along with a picture of a box full of the sex toys, striped in gay pride rainbow colors. Putin has cracked down viciously on Russia’s LGBT community in recent years, and even jeopardized the Sochi Olympics in 2014 with anti-gay federal legislation in the country.

When other Twitter users asked what Putin was supposed to do with a big box of dildos, Tanden replied in another tweet: “I don’t know. Suck them. Eat them. Shove them up something. He’ll figure it out.”

Republicans on Capitol Hill, who have recently begun to lionize the Russian dictator, were apoplectic. “The President-elect needs to get control of her staff,” Paul Ryan told reporters from his home in Janesville, Wisconsin, where he was spending the holiday break with his family. “If this is how the Clinton administration will conduct diplomacy, we are in very dangerous times.”

Arizona Senator John McCain, a longtime Russia hawk who has not yet joined the pro-Putin bandwagon in his party, was more sanguine about the provocative act. “Putin?” he told a reporter by telephone from his Sedona, Arizona, ranch, “Yeah, Putin can eat a dick.”

(Box photo: z287marc / remix by BNN)




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